The Many Mask We Wear - A Halloween Reflection on Authenticity and Self-Love

Oh fall, the fresh air, leaves changing colours, harvest time and kids in cute and scary costumes for Halloween is here!

Growing up, Halloween was never celebrated in my house. I was told it was an “evil” holiday, and even on the rare occasions we participated, I had to wear costumes that didn’t reflect who I was or what I loved. I wanted the freedom to choose to express myself, to be seen as I wanted to be seen.

When I became a teenager, that freedom finally seemed possible. I remember one Halloween so vividly: I found the cutest Red Riding Hood costume. I felt beautiful, confident, and excited to finally step into something that reflected me. But when I wore it to my school’s Halloween event, I was told to change. Another girl wore the exact same costume, but because she was smaller and more petite, no one said a word. I was told my costume was “too short,” that it “showed too much.” I wasn’t being inappropriate, I was simply being me. Still, I was made to feel ashamed of my body and my confidence.

One thing I and so many other fuller women hear far too often is that “big girls shouldn’t wear certain things.” Whether it’s about Halloween costumes or everyday clothes, there always seems to be a list of unspoken rules. We’re told that black is the “safest” colour because it makes us look thinner, or that we should avoid bold prints, tight fits, or anything that draws attention.         

That experience stayed with me, not just on Halloween night, but through much of my life. While people may hold their own opinions about Halloween, I’ve learned it’s far from evil. For many, it’s a joyful time for children (and the young at heart) to celebrate, to dress up as something they love whether fun, silly, cute, or spooky—and to enjoy candy, movies, and laughter together.

Part of the tradition involves wearing masks, hiding our true selves for a night as we visit neighbours’ homes calling out “trick or treat,” or head off to parties filled with playful mystery. It’s meant to be just one night of make-believe—or so I thought.

But as I’ve grown older, I’ve realized that many of us wear masks every day. Not the plastic kind, but the invisible ones we create to fit in, to please others, to protect ourselves.

Throughout my life, I’ve worn so many different masks. At work, I wore one that made me seem more serious, quieter, and smaller. At school, I wore another to blend in. Around friends and family, sometimes even another—always adjusting, always shrinking to fit the boxes society built for me. Especially as women, we’re often told how we should look, act, and express ourselves. We’re told not to be “too loud,” “too opinionated,” “too much.” Over time, those masks start to blur with who we really are, until one day, you realize you’ve forgotten what your true face even looks like.

After years of pain and loneliness—of being a fuller woman who kept shrinking on the inside, missing opportunities, and believing I didn’t deserve more—I finally got tired. Tired of pretending. Tired of wearing masks just to fit in or feel accepted.

I remember asking myself, “Is my life worth less because I’m not a size 2?”Life can’t be meant to feel this small; and that’s when everything began to change.

When I finally decided to unmask myself, it wasn’t easy. I had to sit down and ask—who am I when I stop trying to please everyone else? What do I love? What do I stand for? The journey back to my authentic self has been messy, emotional, and deeply healing. I’ve learned to embrace my voice, my curves, my opinions, and my passions. I’ve learned that being confident in who you are isn’t arrogance—it’s freedom.

The Miss Fuller Women Competition has been such a powerful part of that journey. It’s given me space to express myself without apology, to celebrate the fullness of who I am—inside and out. The women I’ve met here have shown me what it means to be supported, uplifted, and unashamedly authentic. They remind me every day that I don’t have to wear a mask to be accepted, beautiful or important!

If you’re struggling with your own mask, let me remind you of this: you are enough, exactly as you are. Don’t let anyone’s opinion of you shrink your light or make you doubt your worth. Life is far too short to spend it pretending to be someone else.

This Halloween, have fun. Dress up, laugh loud, and wear whatever makes you feel free, fierce, or simply you. Take off the mask, step into your truth, and let the world meet the real you.

Because you are worth being seen and whatever you do—don’t live in the mask.

Unapologetically and Mask-Free

Hannah, Your Miss Fuller Woman Queen 2025